///Pasha///
Saturday, Dec. 06, 2003 at 9:34 p.m.
Why do I honestly even try anymore? Fucking honestly. It doesnt matter how "good" my life seems to I will never be truly happy; //Never truly happy//
Even when I saw that big envelop from National Registry telling me that I passed the test, that I am offical a certified EMT. When I read the letter that congradulated me, seen the beautiful white patch, the card with my name on it and the certificate that dubs me important I was speechless. I had final reached a real goal that I had been working on two years to achieve. But it really wasnt what I hoped it would be. Even though I passed I still felt let down.
I got thinking today....why do I even write in here? What do I get out of this? It never changed anyones life or really ever made me happy. So tell me what the fuck I am doing.
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